With news like this, who needs parody?

Spike in drug offences shows success of police operations

DRUG offences in the North East have skyrocketed in recent months — and police couldn’t be happier.

The spike in recorded drug-related crimes shows the success of police operations targeting the trafficking of ice and cannabis, Benalla Inspector Mark Byers said.

Figures from Victoria Police released yesterday show drug offences in Benalla have increased 40 per cent between April last year and March this year — 154 offences compared with 110 in April 2012 to March last year.

In Wangaratta, 403 offences were recorded compared with 335 the year before, up 20 per cent.

That’s the great thing about being a drug warrior. No matter what happens, you’re a winner! All you have to do is declare it so.

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